Although it might seem like a slightly selfish motive, being kind and doing something for someone less fortunate than yourself can help you learn to love yourself. There are lots of different ways to do something kind, but one of the best, long-term ways you can do something for someone else is by volunteering. If you fancy giving this a go, pick a volunteer opportunity that suits you and your skill set. For example, you could help out at a local swimming club, befriend an elderly person or use your marketing experience to promote a local charity.
If you feel like you don’t have enough time to volunteer, think again. Researchers from the Wharton School at University of Pennsylvania, Harvard Business School and the Yale School of Management found that people who volunteered actually felt like they had more time. So, get searching for that perfect opportunity and once you’ve found it you’ll soon start to feel better about yourself.
Become your hero for the day
If you have something important coming up that you don’t feel confident about, such as an interview or a speech you have to deliver, you might find that pretending to be your hero for the day can give you that hit of confidence you need to pull it off.
If you want to try this out for yourself choose someone that you can identify with, but who is also well known for his or her confidence. Then begin to act like them. Although you don’t have to speak in their accent or use any of their quirky mannerisms, envisioning your hero can have a surprisingly positive impact upon your own body language and tone of voice. Fingers crossed this activity will help you successfully achieve what you set out to do and this success will then help you feel good about yourself.
Retrain your thoughts
How many times in a day do you think negatively about yourself? Now ask yourself how many times you compliment yourself during the day. We bet you have far more negative thoughts about yourself than you do positive. Although many of us are guilty of doing this, it is unacceptable and it needs to change.
A great way to alter your behaviour and learn to love yourself is to retrain the way you think. You can do this by following up every negative thought you have about yourself with a positive. For example, if you tell yourself that you are ugly, old or overweight, follow this bad thought up with something positive, like: ‘I have great skin, hair and a good smile’. Increasing the number of positive thoughts you have about yourself during the day will hopefully help you to enjoy being you and will help to boost your self-esteem.
Admit your flaws and take action
We all have flaws and that’s fine. It is just something that we have to accept. Yet some people’s flaws can interfere with their life and become an obstacle that stands between them and their happiness. If you have a flaw that is becoming a problem it is time to admit that you need to change.
You might have a foul temper, have an issue with food, be cripplingly jealous or be going through a wild phase that has become out of control. Whatever your flaw, remember that you will be unable to love yourself until you address these issues and you will feel a million times better about yourself if you seek some help.
There are some people in this life that are just no good for us. If you have friends, boyfriends, girlfriends or colleagues who undermine you, belittle you or are just plain mean, you need to have a think about addressing the issue and confronting them about their behaviour.
This can be extremely daunting, especially if they bully you. Remember though that no one has the right to put you down and the only way people will stop acting in this way is if they know you won’t accept it. Be brave, plan what you are going to say so that you can communicate clearly and then sit down and talk through your issue face to face. If the problem continues it might be time to consider cutting them out of your life altogether. Life is too short to waste on people that don’t make you feel good and hanging around with negative people will make it hard for you to love yourself.